Nearly Headless Nick's Deathday Party

Not all food in the Harry Potter world in appetizing. We find various grizzly and gruesome creations peppering the series, which I think appeal particularly to the child's imagination. I still find the grotesque immensely pleasurable to read, but it seems to me, in terms of food anyway, to be a phenomenon found almost exclusively in children's literature. Rowling, however, finds clever ways to make revolting food a guilty reading pleasure for both children and adults, which is especially evident in the example of Nearly Headless Nick's 'deathday party'.

Nick, who is flawlessly played by John Cleese in the films, is Gryffindor House's bumbling resident ghost. Not scary in the slightest, he is generally a laughing stock, mocked by both the students and other ghosts. It is the humour that Rowling injects into this character's plight that makes it so enjoyable to read, and his party so entertaining for both adults and children.

The hilarity ensues with Nearly Headless Nick being informed that he can't take part in the 'Headless Horseman's Hunt' because his head is still attached (the clue's in the name). Nick, rather deflated, shows his guests into the dungeon where the party is being held where they are confronted by the party food buffet...

"“Look, food!” said Ron.
On the other side of the dungeon was a long table, also covered in black velvet. They approached it eagerly but next moment had stopped in their tracks, horrified. The smell was quite disgusting.
Large, rotten fish were laid on handsome silver platters; cakes, burned charcoal-black, were heaped on salvers; there was a great maggoty haggis, a slab of cheese covered in furry green mould and, in pride of place, an enormous grey cake in the shape of a tombstone, with tar-like icing forming the words,

Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington 

died 31st October, 1492 

Harry watched, amazed, as a portly ghost approached the table, crouched low, and walked through it, his mouth held wide so that it passed through one of the stinking salmon.
“Can you taste it if you walk through it?” Harry asked him.
“Almost,” said the ghost sadly, and he drifted away.
“I expect they’ve let it rot to give it a stronger flavor,” said Hermione knowledgeably, pinching her nose and leaning closer to look at the putrid haggis.
“Can we move? I feel sick,” said Ron.
They had barely turned around, however, when a little man swooped suddenly from under the table and came to a halt in midair before them.
“Hello, Peeves,” said Harry cautiously.
Unlike the ghosts around them, Peeves the Poltergeist was the very reverse of pale and transparent. He was wearing a bright orange party hat, a revolving bow tie, and a broad grin on his wide, wicked face.
“Nibbles?” he said sweetly, offering them a bowl of peanuts covered in fungus."

(Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Chapter Eight - The Deathday Party)

Ron's excitement at the food is short lived as they get closer to the putrid dishes which, had they have been fresh, would surely have been an impressive feast in anyone's book. The classic dinner party food (Hogwarts is in Scotland, so the haggis would have been less out of place than we might imagine) is turned into something quite disgusting, but it's quite amusing to think of ghosts still trying to impress with a fine spread. The spread, of course, is pointless, as the portly ghost tells us. The image of Peeves offering them peanuts, like any well behaved host, is made really quite funny when we find out that they're covered in mould.

I found out that there is a traditional Swedish dish of rotting fish called Surstromming which consists of fermented Baltic Herring, but I don't think my culinary skills stretch far enough to attempt this (nor my ability to handle strong smells). So, I decided to use Roald Dahl and Gary Rhodes' Revolting Recipes to find something that any respectable guest would be proud to bring along to such an event. Revolting Recipes is a great book for any budding cook, young or old, to really enjoy making the foul food found in children's literature.

I settled for 'Stink Bugs' Eggs' from James and the Giant Peach. I hard boiled some eggs, cooled in them in cold water, then smashed the shells with the back of a spoon. I then left them overnight in a bowl of water with a tablespoon of food colouring mixed in.

The next morning, I carefully removed the shells, which was extremely fiddly for my clumsy fingers. Somehow, the green food colouring had stained the eggs blue, but I still think it's quite a good effect.

I think they'd look great slotted in between the rotting salmon and the maggoty haggis.